carburettedbrain

The Indian Premier League has completed 10 glorious years this season. 10 years of cheerleaders gyrating on the sidelines, 10 years of watching "Six hitting machines", 10 years of flat, lifeless pitches, 10 years of the bat dominating the ball and not the best 10 years in the history of cricket if you ask me.        Sure, the sport is popular like never before. Cricket is more accessible now, there is an endless supply of talent coming through from all the corners of the country. There has been more cash in the sport in the last 10 years than the previous 100 years. The question I would like to ask is, has the spirit of the game really changed over these last few years?        Name 5 bowlers from the last decade who have made an indelible mark on your minds. Do you remember any fast bowlers who instilled fear in the hearts and minds of the batsmen? Or any spinners who rattled the cages of the batsmen facing them? Well, your might argue that Ash...

I am not very fussy when it comes to food, my mother will probably disagree, but really I am not very picky about what I eat. Methi (fenugreek), palak (spinach) and karela (bitter gourd) are an exception to this rule. Fast food and I have been in a long and successful relationship. A fortnight ago, on Thursday, Facebook announced that a new 'food truck park' had materialized in Viman nagar. So, on Saturday, having cajoled my wife to try out the new 'fried ice cream' we reached the designated spot. We were greeted by colorful trucks and an aroma of meat being grilled nearby. Some of my likeminded friends had already reached before us and were about to get started on some burgers they had bought. So, the food truck park comprised of 7 gaily painted trucks with an assortment of cuisines being served. There is a truck which sells everything in eggs, another truck which sells desserts and snacks. 2 trucks which dish out Mexican stuff, and one good truck whic...

If you are familiar with the story of David and Goliath, you would probably know that David was tiny while Goliath was a giant. However, David with his slingshot brought down the mighty giant. Moral of the story: A small but effective solution can overcome even a mighty problem.                 Coming swiftly to the point now, I propose that the exact same principal can be applied to adult learning. Micro learning - training broken down into short yet informative bits has proven to be beneficial to the learning needs of the millennials. This concept embraces teaching a concise topic which is then tested or applied immediately afterwards.                 Research suggests that 90% of all information taught in a traditional classroom setting is lost within 12 months!  To counter this, micro Learning rejigs your training progr...

Have the Japs missed out on the quarter litre party in India? I was born in the early 80's, i know, you are probably formulating adjectives like ancient, or  antediluvian and laughing your guts out . However, that apart, in those times a motorbike was simply a means of hauling your 'arse' from Point 'Á' to Point 'B'. We had a wide choice of 4 motorbikes to choose from, viz. Bajaj (made the KB100), TVS-Suzuki(made the AX-100, IND-Suzuki) and Hero Honda (made the CD100 of the fill it, shut it, forget it fame). If you look closely the integer 100 is the HCF. Circa 2016, Indians have woken up to the fact that motorbikes are not simply for getting you from home to office and back. You now see bearded 20 year olds wearing t-shirts with quotes like, four wheels move the body, but two wheels move the soul. If you see a new motorbike, the first question they ask you is probably how fast does it go as opposed to "kitna deti hai" (whats the average petro...

Its like logic never crossed paths with writers of this film if I were to be ernest. But then again if they all had Quad core processors in their heads, who would make movies? There is something oddly captivating about the 'shape-shifty-car-robot-' thingies isn't there? If you are a car fanatic like me, then you would have to like them on principle, but even the doe eyed, curly haired damsels covered their eyes or cupped their mouths when optimus' arm gets dismembered which is a touching moment. I am still clueless about how all of a sudden everyone remembers that there is something buried on the moon, or why Monsiur Sam cannot get a job, why the seals/army types accomplish in the entire movie, or even what Sams "new british" girlfriends' actual role in the film is besides showing her posterior or running helter skelter to no apparent destination. I can bet that she could have been given "Lord Voldemorts nose" (or the lack of it) and no one woul...

A blind man, with a wooden leg and no shoes could run more efficiently on hot coals than Gambhir ! Seriously.. if he wanted to take a crap.. I mean there is always the option of RETIRED HURT! Bowling out OZ on a "sandpit" within 260 was India outdoing itself in the field today.. however they became their usual selves in their chase... doddering idiots! Its like they fancy being Real Madrid.. Yuvraj finally does justice to the talent that he possess, coming in at No.5 and still managing to score more than 300 runs in the tourney at an average of over 100 is no easy task. Add to that the dozen or so wickets.. and a few brilliant saves in the field.. he for me is the Cricketer of the tournament already. I am a huge fan of Mr. Smash it out of the ground-Pathan but I prefer the cool head on his shoulders Raina to be honest. He is more of a batsman for me.. not as flamboyant as pathan but a safer bet in any condition. he was a bit off colour on the SA tour against the short stuff,...

It has been an unusual Sunday for me considering I spent the better part of it glued to the tele rather than galavanting around town or spend time munching onto something spicy. Its been a good day if you're a sport lover for the following reasons. Chronologically the English downed the South Africans in a gem of a world cup game of cricket. The Lads from Manchester were beaten comprehensively at home by the Liverpudlians and the Irish made a match of it when India were tottering at a 100-4 while chasing a moderate 208 in a 50 over contest. England for me have looked like an up-and-down side this world cup. Having nearly chased down India's 338 on the 27th of February, they allowed the Irish to beat them even after having posted a huge 329 whilst batting. I reckon a certain Mr. O'Brien had to do a lot with England losing. 100 of 50 balls against a quality side speaks volumes of his batting prowess. I would like to see more of him in the coming games. The big one now. ...

ALL my Ntrance friends are going to love this, er maybe :) “U never address a person by saying Mr. and his first name for Gods sake! Its always Mr.Last name… Do I need to teach you that as well now? God!” He thundered… His wrath rained upon poor old Snehal for the second time in the past two hours. She was white knucled, trembling and mad at the same time! I mean they were all of afraid of him weren’t they? Justin Pitter! QAL, Hitler for others was one of the nicest persons I have worked with. Here are some excerpts from an interview I conducted only recently… DS: Mr.P how does life do u then? JP: It does me like it does u don’t it boy? DS: Do u miss the old days at Ntrance? JP: Course I do, I miss all the fun and the lovely people (sniggers) I spent some of my most memorable days in Helpline, and met some brilliant people as well, take u for instance! DS: Praise from JP? What’s the catch there Mr.? JP: No catch, good mood today, the vodka was exceptional tonight.. DS: Aah, so now w...

If your indian and speak any other language other than english as ur first language, which you probably do, and you have either a mother, grandmother, sister, or any such relative at home and like most indian homes if you have just one TV in ur home, ur going to know exactly what I am talking about. You have been subjected to emotional and mental torture from watching soaps in a vernacular language on prime time television..and therein lies the problem. To start with all of them are either family oriented soaps or dance shows, the comedy thingys are passe as of now; thankfully they were really getting on my nerves. So tell me who wears sarees worth 50 grand and gold worth 5 lacs when they're at home? Well lets overlook that.. and come to the actual soaps.. The plot almost always has to involve 2 women in conflict over either property, husbands, wealth, revenge, any or all of the above in not necessarily that order. The pace at which these serials r...

I, recently having tricked someone into employing me, am going to get paid for my efforts. Hence I find the need to open an account in a bank. I have a wide choice of 2 banks to open an account with, namely HDFC and Axis bank. Excellent. Since I tend to run as far away from any geometrical sounding terms, naturally I shirked away from Axis and went in for the other choice. That is where it all began. How hard can it be to get yourself a silly piece of paper called an “ account opening form ?” Well the answer is Very with a capital V! My poor mum was the first person to have unsuccessfully tried to acquire the said form; she came back flustered not having remembered the name and address of my company. And hence I was personally required to get short leave and get myself a form. Fair enough, I did so at the next opportunity I got. Asked my HR executive where the nearest HDFC bank outlet was and I was on my way. Alas I was informed that the systems in the bank were down and ...

4/5 new cars bought in India are hatchbacks. No surprises there. 5 doors, Great packaging, easy to drive, more importantly easier on the pocket, simple to park and generally a hassle free way of put putting about. But nothing exciting really. Nothing that will make the 12 year old inside you sit up and take notice. Bread and butter in other words. No Mozzarella Cheese here. I wonder why. If Merc and BMW can manage to sell a few thousand units every month, surely car manufacturers like Suzuki and VW and Ford can manage to get rid of a few hundred hot hatches here can’t they? Why don’t we get say the new Fiesta, or the Golf GTI or even the 3 door Suzuki Swift that sells in Europe ? Someone somewhere has to realize that Indian customers are finally waking up to quality products priced appropriately are a better buy then your cheap and cheerful goods that need to be chucked outta the window once every couple of years. Imagine the Scirocco being sold here alongside the Fabia...

Cut your Fuel bills by upto 40%! Here is how.. Now I ain’t exactly what u call a nature freak, an environmentalist or a miser(debatable that one) when it comes to motoring, however I always end up getting more out of every drop of fuel than the joe average. No I don’t drive at 38.58kmph all the time which is incidently the speed recommended by my bike manufacturer for the optimum fuel efficiency , nor do I drive so slowly that I end up leading a procession of sorts behind me . All I do is follow a few simple rules to ensure that I get the best bang out of my buck when it comes to fuel. U could end up saving as much as Rs3000/- per annum on your fuel bills if u drive a car, and a third of that if u ride a bike should choose to follow these simple practices. 1. Tire pressure check: The most overlooked bit in the history of motoring. Not only do the tires carry your car or bike’s weight, that little cushion of air is also responsible for your safety. The best thing to do is...

If you live in Pune, or anywhere in India for that matter you may have come across dozens of people who flout traffic rules, park haphazardly, or drive or ride with a complete disregard to their own wellbeing or the safety of pedestrians and other road users. Tell you what, I have an ingenious plan to get rid of all the people in my city who either drive badly, park badly, violate traffic rules and generally piss you off. Here is how I plan to go about it. Step 1:We start a fund to support this drive. Step 2:We buy me an old T72B Russian Made battle tank. Step 3:I either bulldoze/flatten or use my bazooka to get people to comply. Its going to work, trust me. And this is the best solution, well apart from having the Italian Mafia marksmen shoot them down on all days excepts Tuesday if it happens to be the 29 of any month, however its not going to be as entertaining while dealing with the problem. Be it the student cyclist or the bloke on the motorcycle, the cute girl on her scooty, ev...

Whats common in the following Le Mans Winners since 2005, fastest land speed record holder of 563kmph, and the latest Lamborghini Estoque all are Diesel powered. The fuel of Satan is taking over the world and purists and connoisseurs are helpless! Traditionally all cars ran on petrol and ungainly and heavy things like buses and lorries and trains used Diesel for propulsion. But now even the little city cars are running on diesel. Whats the world coming to eh? Is this a good thing or a bad thing then? Don't ask me, cause I don't know myself. But even the Astons and the Lambos of the world are looking at diesels as an alternative to petrol. this can of course mean on thing, the world is going to end! While the inventors of the petrol engine sat back and rested on their posteriors, the guys who made the diesels have been scratching their heads ever since and have come up with a plethora of newbies. Common rail technology, particulate filters, selective catalytic conv...

After a gap of nearly two years we have the National Supercross being held in the city. A variety of changes have been made since we last witnessed the event. A major change was the move from 2 Stroke to 4 stroke in the Indian Masters and Foreign open class.Also a now team viz. Team Pashankar Racing has taken part to compete with the big boys from Team TVS. This team is based out of Pune and has fields very promising talent from the city. Most of the aficionados remember the fierce battles that took place between the two factory teams from Yamaha and TVS. but since Team Yamaha quit racing, it has been dominated by the Team TVS riders on superior machines. This year however there are two new entrants Team Sidvin India and Team Pashankar which should make tomorrows event interesting. The New Apache RTR`s 180 and RTR 160 look very fine indeed. Local talent is competing in the Novice and Local class races which are running the usual Yamaha RX 100, and RX 135 in both stock an...

"Guys we have storms in the UK" the single most dreaded line that everyone hated had just been announced by a certain Mr. S, bossman who everyone thought had fascistic views on running the show, however whose devotion could never be question, had uttered the words. Storms - disturbed state of the atmosphere implying destructive or unpleasant weather could really ruin our day or week even. Workloads would quadruple, breaks cancelled and all privileges taken away. "Calls in queue, take those calls" this line would ricochet off the walls, every 31.5 seconds in alternate male and female voices. Shit like they say had just got real. Even then the folk stuck together and rode the tidal wave of work with earnest devotion. Such was the spirit at property claims. Training was by far the best part of my career. "Training is like providing a Ninja with weapons" we were told, "how it is used decides the fate of the duel"...of course I never understood t...

"This has been a most rewarding experience and I have enjoyed every moment working here." Everyone was practically asleep with the exception of Ms. A who listened to every word I had uttered in my farewell address and was smiling, she always had something to smile about had Ms.A and Mr. A who was busy noting points that he could use in his farewell speech 40 years later maybe. So that was done with, the bossman got up on cue and said something appropriate and befitting the occasion. It was my last day in Axa for I was leaving to continue my education and sell my wares elsewhere. My journey of approximately a year and half had thus ended. Dhruva Salvi, Claims Advisor, Property Claims had become an ex employee, history. Most people were glad about it I suppose, and so was I for this broke the monotony of the past few months and I am always looking for something new, forever the audacious one. I wasn't exactly the one to have set things on fire and affected the co...

I remember whence i was a kid when someone said cricket men in whites and funny mustaches was all that my mind could conjure up. Cricket used to be 5 day affair and players often had something else to earn their livelihood and played cricket when they got the time. That was when the Dennis Lillies, and Gary Sobers and the Gavaskars of the world played cricket. In contrast today's cricket is merely like a trailer to the main movie. Colourful garb, painted faces and 20-20? Whats next? Tennis ball cricket played with a stump? On the upside viewership has increased manifold, and cricket can make you one of the worlds richest people, playing cricket or otherwise. In todays world the Dravids and the Bravos of the world are looked like they accidently took the wrong stop whilst time travelling. Nobody wears the baggy green caps anymore, no one has the Einstein hairdo and funny mustaches anymore. Ah the spirit of cricket has been crushed. What was wrong with Test cricket I...